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| GARY HUBBARD Couples Counseling Center (815) 877-2882 http://couplecounselingcenter-il.com/ |
abuse is occurring, it is advisable to attempt marriage counseling before
seeking a divorce.
CONCEPT. The heart of a marriage is the human connection between partners.
When that connect starts to fade/crumble, some outside help may be necessary
to rekindle that connection. How we relate is developed from patterns seen or
followed in the past. A counselor can help support/debunk the lessons learned
from the role models that shaped each individual's perceptions and
expectations of marriage. A counselor will need to learn of each partner's
background to be able to assist the couple effectively.
COST. Many health insurance companies cover marriage counseling. It is
therefore advisable to use a counselor that is approved by your insurance. If
your insurance does not cover counseling, there any many options throughout
the community for counseling at any budget. If a couple attends a church, the
minister/priest/paster may provide counseling at little or no cost.
CHOOSING A COUNSELOR. It is best to select a counselor who specializes in
marriage counseling. There are many counseling styles. It is best to inquire as
to the techniques used prior to beginning the counseling sessions. If one type
of counseling or counselor is uncomfortable for one or both spouses, seek
another counselor prior to declaring counseling a failure.
RECOMMENDATION. Attorney Angela Lund-Logan recommends couples
counselor Gary Hubbard. Gary is trained through the Gottman Institute and uses
the techniques of John Gottman, the first to scientifically study marriage and
divorce.
REFUSES TO ATTEND COUNSELING. Before you give up on the
counseling idea, find out the reason your partner will not attend counseling. You
may be able to open a dialog about counseling once you know the reason for the
refusal. Knowing the reason may also give you deeper insight into the issues of
your marriage. Common reasons to refuse counseling include:
- Denial: spouse doesn't believe you have problems or the problems are
not that serious
- Defeatism: spouse thinks the marriage is over and cannot be saved
- Avoidance: spouse doesn't want to admit to his/her wrongdoings or will
cause pain to their spouse
- Threat: spouse believes that talking about the problems will lead to
divorce
- Control Issues:
- spouse doesn't want someone to tell him what to do
- lack of respect for mental healthcare providers
If you are seeking counseling for your marriage/relationship, Angela Lund-Logan
recommends:
recommends: